508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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