I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
