I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
