its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
i think i just lost a toe
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
