kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize