I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Randomize