you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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