I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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