i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
