are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
Randomize
