So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
