i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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