loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Randomize
