He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
Randomize
