Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
