How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
God, I missed his penis.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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