marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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