i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
you have to choose: penises or morals?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
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