She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
