The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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