I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
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