Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
