He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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