he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
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