once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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