Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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