I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
