I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I am never drinking with the goths again.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Randomize
