I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
