How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
