I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
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