I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
