I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
