3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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