This girl is more easily done than said...
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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