Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
