It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
My vagina is very pro this idea
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
