This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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