We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
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