Duck Duck Cougar?
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize