Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Holy shit dude........stairs
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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