Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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