So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
not ubering you a puppy
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Randomize
