rhymes with "ouble enetration"
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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