Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
