we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
