Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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