Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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