she woke up with a sticky ear
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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