I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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