it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize